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Sunday, May 4, 2003

Final Destination 2 Horror Movie Review

Saw Final Destination 2 today. I didn’t see the prequel (which people say was inferior) but I liked the trailer.
The movie is neo-splatter with definite b-plot but nicely done, practically no boring minute and super smooth effects, the actors (all no-names) never annoying.

The basic story is that when you cheat life, Death will try taking it back from you. So this woman Kimberly is about to turn out to the highway when she has an extra gory vision of an accident about to happen. She saves a bunch of lives when she causes a traffic jam, but then it turns out they are now in extreme danger because death isn’t happy about that whole (pseudo-philosophical) space-reality-time rip, and trying to balance it out again by killing them all in the most creative “natural” ways.
And that’s really the core of the movie, those loosely connected episodes of creative, explicit, every-day deadly accidents. Like a slasher movie, only you won’t get to see the baddie. After you might think twice about touching that microwave in your kitchen.

Well, I suggest you go and see this one for yourself if you’re interested. While waiting for the sequel, I’ll file Final Destination 2 under “fresh horror approach” (alongside with Scream et al).

My fake night with a teen pop star

“So im thinking I need to get a life.....but then, i do have one. Just not an interesting one. I need more drama in my life. Maybe i should start making up stories to blog about. No one would ever know ... hahaha.”
The very secret disco life of fishies

That reminds me of last night. OK, I wasn’t expecting much from my usual pub tour. Tequila here, some pool, laughter, boredom and smoke, same old.
But then around 9 pm, Britney Spears showed up. We got into some chit-chat over a beer. Like I was mentioning her fake boobs, and how her music was really bad and so on, and she giggled. She’s actually quite nice to hang around with, with the make-up down, face-to-face and all, like when she’s not singing or dancing.

We went out to swim in the river later, the moon shining bright above, when we realized we didn’t pay the bill back in the pub. Britney was like all freaking out, and I said relax don’t destroy the romantic mood. She was like, with Justin that never happened, and I was like duh I’m not rich I don’t dance in a cheesy boy-band. That’s when she gave me a soft hug and we started kissing on the shore later.

Anyway it was 1 am by now and the two of us were still high on booze.
I took out something to smoke and we were getting all philosophical, about relationships, the music business, and why self-mutilation is not the way to go for teenagers, and how she’d feel like she was “not yet a woman”, overprotected and all. She tried to tell me a joke but couldn’t for the life of it finish (something about Sigmund Freud and an elephant, if I remember right).
Then she’d assert me Tom Cruise really is that small, though charming, on a certain childish level. That’s about when her boss called her up, she should get ready for her album signing next day and all and shouldn’t be like out drinking, and she was like hanging up on him, saying she’d quit and all that. That’s when she started to cry, and I was like don’t play that cliche with me I never even liked your lyrics, and that’s when we kissed. Actually, she’s a better kisser than you’d think, even though I don’t like her style otherwise.

Well the rest of the night was a bit of a blur, but finally the bartender hunted us down and threatened Britney to release some sneaky photos he took of us together, so we sort of paid him and went back home, separately. What a night. OK, maybe an exciting life isn’t that exciting after all.

Man Bites Dog

Why do newspapers always focus on the bad news? Why do we get a lot of death cases reported every day; how come nobody ever mentions when new life is born, or brought to existence? If it’s news, it’s mostly about some celebrity; why never about the normal everyday people? Because the famous have more impact on our life? Excuse me – whatever a pop girlie would do or say or wear or not wear in her new video, it wouldn’t affect your life personally, unless you’re her manager or something (and then you’d already know it’s a publicity stunt anyway).
And if it’s about normal, every-day people, why always so materialistic, like “Car Mechanics Hits Jackpot”. What about “Car Mechanic Comes Home, Gets Warm Hug From Wife”. Isn’t that more important, a healthy relationship? And just as shockingly newsworthy, considering they’re together for umpteen years.
Dog bites man ain’t newsworthy, but if man bites dog, you’ve got a story [1]. Excuse me, what’s so unusual about the weekly catastrophes? Is it about the surprise factor really, or sheer voyeurism? Are you that surprised another car crashed, another politician lied, another company went bankrupt, or that a blizzard ruined a farm? Or do you actually just enjoy seeing others embarrassment and lack of fortune because it makes you feel better in contrast?
Come on. If you’re not there the moment it happened, it doesn’t otherwise affect you – and if you were there, the news would be much too late.
So what’s happening?

Google Web Opinion Poll: “dog bites man” (2,700), “man bites dog” (12,200).

[1] “I bit him in the head,” Robbins, 44, said yesterday, a day after the 11 a.m. attack outside a Melville elementary school. “I definitely got him in the skull. I had skin and fur in my mouth."

Solving World Hunger, Advert-o-Scope

How to solve world hunger, or any other major problem?

“People are lazy. There’s no question about it. I can’t count the number of times I’ve picked up the phone, ordered Chinese food, then driven to the restaurant and back, simply to avoid the effort required to boil spaghetti. People don’t work efficiently unless there’s a definite reason to do so. This presents a problem, since there are countless threats that need to be solved (disease, famine, William Shatner, etc.) Any society that properly motivates people will be, on the whole, far better off.”
– Eric ’Pi’ Minbiole

Read the page to find out why “challenges involving women can provide powerful motivation”.

The Home of Pi also brings my weekly Advert-O-Scope:

“Gemini (May 21 - June 21):
Charlton Heston will appear to you in a dream, urging you to protect your constitutional right to bear arms.”
– Sy Ambercrombie (part time astrologer, full time advertising executive)


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