Monday, August 21, 2006

Your Superhero Co-workers

• The Riddler: You never really understand this type of co-worker. Sometimes he’s nice, sometimes unfriendly, sometimes knowledgeable, and sometimes dumb. The Riddler smokes and drinks and eats, but so irregularly that you wonder if he’s a smoker, or a drinker (or an eater).
• Invisible Woman: The Invisible Woman (pictured below) is largely unnoticed in your office. She’s on the payroll, so everyone understands she’s somehow doing a good job, though no one understands exactly what this job is. Invisible Woman will avoid all after-work socialization, quietly leaving when work is done. The Invisible Woman doesn’t need to call in sick as no one will notice her missing anyway.
• The Punisher: The Punisher is usually higher up in the hierarchy as he likes to bully people. When you did something wrong, The Punisher arrives on the scene to make you feel it by use of excessive force. Sometimes, when there’s two Punishers in one office, a no holds barred battle is going to erupt.
• The Joker: The Joker is loved by half of his colleagues for his witty quips. The other half is annoyed by him for being a smart-ass. The Joker is the arch-enemy of The Punisher.
• Doctor Octopus: Doc Ock always has one arm in every business. No project is safe from the Doc – he’s connected to almost everyone and everything in the office... managing to take credit for almost everything, too.
• Black Canary: The Black Canary can kill enemies by use of her ultrasonic scream. Part villain, part superhero, part beauty and part beast, her trademarked fishnet stockings are sure to fool strangers. Little is known of the Black Canary’s background as mostly no one survived to tell the tale.
• Batman: Batman is an effective loner who likes to do things his own way. He’s often working in the dark, at high speed, with surprising results. No one is exactly sure which tools he’s pulling from his batbelt, but as they seem to work, the Batman is largely untouchable.
• Tomorrow Girl: This co-worker of astounding beauty is known to be so into fashion, she’ll be wearing the clothes today that others will wear tomorrow (hence her name).
• Sandman: Watching the Sandman work can be painful, resembling the motion of sand falling through an hour glass. Time passes, the project deadline looms, yet you get the feeling nothing much happens. The Sandman however is known to be able to shift his shape to actually kick some ass every know now and then.
• Flash: Flash can type around 120 words per minutes, and gets most project done by lunchtime.
• Wonder Girl: Wonder Girl is a loved and respected person, and she always surprises her colleagues by handing out candy and other gifts during the day.
• Doctor Strange: A feared person, Doctor Strange works as a sysadmin. His magic powers affect every machine in his near surroundings. Doc Strange, whose history remains in the dark, is often called when other superheroes’ tools failed.
• The Cosmic Weasel: The Cosmic Weasel is known to be so afraid of his boss that he’ll do anything to avoid confrontation, including but not limited to not telling the truth when needed. Otherwise, the Weasel is adorable but harmless.
• Cyborg: Cyborg can work 24 hours without losing a sweat thanks to his part-mechanic body. He’s especially useful in projects which don’t require a lot of teamwork, but need to be implemented quickly.
• The Hulk: Dr. Reed Richards Bruce Banner seems to be nice enough in most meetings, but make him angry, and he quickly turns green n’ mean.
• Gambit: Gambit is the office’s beau, certain to attract the attention of female co-workers. He has a couple of cards up his sleeve though he likes to keep them secret.
• Juggernaut: The Juggernaut is often a superhero group’s leader. Showing little disrespect for other people’s sensibilities, once he started to walk in a certain direction it’s hard to change his way. The Juggernaut is often causing immense destruction, but he also gets every door opened.

[Image by Marvel, DC etc. Thanks Celeste.]

Your Superhero Co-workers by Philipp Lenssen | Comments (8)

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