Sorrows of a Young Man

The sorrows of a young man in the city, being a palimpsest of Goethe's Werther.

Monday, August 18, 2003

Her boyfriend's back

Michael arrived, and that makes me leave! Really, he could be the best, most loyal, good-hearted guy – I couldn't stand to see him possess such perfection (possess!). Her boyfriend's back! A good and nice man. Lucky I wasn't there when he came back. Would have ripped me apart.

At least he got the dignity to not kiss her when I'm around. Thank god. You have to admit he's full of respect for her. Got to give that to him. He's even nice to me, though I suspect that's more Jennifer's work than anyone's. That's a real skill of a woman, to have two people around them... both loving her, and to even make them like each other... whichever way it goes it'll always be good for the woman.

Can't hide my respect for Michael. He's all cool on the outside, big contrast to me acting all hyper. He's emotional, and he knows what he's got with Jennifer. In fact he's always nice... if there's one thing I hate in people, it's when they're always nice.

He thinks I'm a sensitive guy... and the more I show my appreciation of all of Jennifer's moves, all of her being, the more he's proud she's his, the more he loves her. I don't know if he's acting jealous at times... I can tell you, if I'd be him, I would.

Whatever. Can't be happy now around Jenn. I guess I was blind, a fool, whatever you want to call it... god, and you're right, I knew it all before. I knew it all, didn't make a move on Jenn (well, as much as I could resist, she being who she is)... and now I'm like all shocked when this guy's actually appearing.

So... making a fist in my pocket and laugh at my self-pity. I'm laughing even harder at those telling me I should just give her up. I get into my car and drive by her place and when I see the window lit, and when I know he's inside, I'm going crazy. When I meet them, I'm acting like a total fool, making jokes, crazy jokes all night. "God, you should stop that! What a stupid scene you made last night. You're nasty when you play funny like that." she said.

Truth be told, I'll wait for the right time, when he's away – boom, I'm there, glad to find her alone.

[Her boyfriend's back]


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