haha... good way to start the day with some humor.

What about Google Porn? Oh wait, that's already... nevermind.

Lore Sjöberg a well known Internet humorist... good one.

what about buying MS and Yahoo! ? :)

1.) Fire Schmidt, hire Ballmer

2.) Change the motto to "Do No Good"

3.) Start to annonce products 2 year ahead with the intentions of never releasing them.

4.) Lawsuits with each and every competitor.

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Sorry guy, we will discuss this subject again in five year or so.

"Google Insider Trading" – some clickstreams are *valuable*!

Why not Google Intelligence or Google Spying?

Slogan: We know everything about everyone – just ask us.

1. Offer free services of all kinds – photo sharing, word processing, spreadsheets, email, calendar, database etc.

2. Offer free unlimited storage until most people have all their critical data on Google's servers.

3. Start charging a very high price for access to that data.

4. Evil profit!

The point is that they won't be able to expand if they are evil.

Haochi, so why is the US still expanding it's world wide influence? If you are big enough, it doesn't matter if evil or not. People are powerless against you then.
In Germany if a company drops in Google it goes bankrupt. Google has 90% market share.

Google Snoop
Google's entry into the private detective market. For a fee, Google will spy for you. Customised tracking via Google Earth and Google Bugging an extra option.

Google accepts no liability whatsoever for any divorces that result.

Google Army
Via patented nano-tech Google cameras , implanted into U.S. miltary helmets, you can get a taste of the action in Iraq. Via the Google MilSense system, if you bid high enough, you can tell the soldier where to shoot next.

Sponsor a soldier today!

Google Windows
We couldnt beat Microsoft on the desktop – so we bought them out.
Let us introduce our new CEO – Bill Gates.

Google Misdirection – buy the removal of sites for *other* searchers.
(i.e. anti-ads – in ads, you buy prominence for your site – in anti-ads, you buy marginalization for other sites).

Google Tyranny – Whatever you enter in Google gets sent to the secret police, along with your name and address. Search for "Freedom", 30 minutes later there's a knock on the door.

Oh, sorry, that's called "Yahoo".

Well they are essentially evil, I mean, someone else's truth is basically my evil. Look at how they're demolishing the software business and essentially paving the road to hell with good intentions. When they're done, there won't be really any value to in anything outside of their fixed internet.

Matt, do you have a longer explanation of your thoughts?